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    March 24

    有谁能教教我开车的保命技能啊

          牺牲周末去学车,对我来说,这压根是不可能的,所以,我打算办个证,但是听刘佳说去驾校可以学各种保命技能,我自己总结了一下,抛砖引玉,为了能让我和你们大家常相厮守,我总结了几点基本的开车保命技能:
         
          一.看着要撞车的时候,实在躲不过去了,就玩命冲过去,千万不能停,加把劲冲过去就看到光明了,反正我觉得这么回事,一般俩人撞一起,都是原地不动的被撞的痛
          二.开车行走在阴暗的小路,一定要带上武器,万一有打劫的还可以拼死反抗一下,就算战死了,也留下一段佳话。
          三.如果前面有人开车慢,你又受不了,你千万不能拿车去撞,很危险,车上带点100克左右的石头子,砸它后玻璃。
          四.上一条的补充,扔石子之前先看清对面车上有几个人,几个男的,仨男的千万别仍,俩男的话,冲动一把也扔了,一个男的看情况仍,没男的,靠!不得不扔了!
          五.油门上放一个大头钉,避免踩错刹车和油门,一般情况下,踩油门不会疼,毕竟真想踩的是油门的话,不会那么用力。
          六.保险杠一定要弄成最结实的。里面再夹层钢,毕竟私家车就这一个武器了。
          七.一定要去双安天桥下买个牌子,平时就用假牌子开,出事后在换个新的。一般牌子也就400左右,如果想要军牌的话可能要900,如果自己去廊坊那边买估计能便宜一半。
          八.平时开车多带点钱,万一被交警抓到也能搏一次。
          九.开车时候窗户一定开小点,要么扔烟头容易被吹回来,容易烫到自己导致汽车失控,窗户开个缝,保证烟头能钻出去就行了。
          十.车上不准有女性,尤其不能旁边坐一个穿裙子的,否则挂档容易挂错地方。别说你是自动档,自动档你如果想特意没事就往旁边挂挂,更容易出事
          虽然我没开过车,但是鉴于我骑车时候撞人撞车无数,但是从来没伤过自己,我觉得我上路还是很安全的。
          有什么好的保命技能都交代清楚,别藏着掖着,害人害己。

    Comments (7)

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    看完这些~非常感叹,我只有一句话总结:

    ——你丫脑门被门夹了吧?!
    Apr. 17
    金昊 刘wrote:
    to 烟姐:....被撞的向后倒,撞人的向前倒,就是学的再明白,也疼啊!
    Mar. 30
    Dollywrote:
    对于第一条,你不是学过作用力与反作用力嘛,虽然据说你死活没弄清楚
    Mar. 27
    金昊 刘wrote:
    等我会开了,我先带你们溜一圈,不刺激我退钱
    Mar. 25
    Dennis Zuowrote:
    你还会骑车?
    Mar. 25
    西微 穆wrote:
    我靠...为了您和他人的人身及财产安全,你还是别开车吧...
    Mar. 25
    bqwrote:
    最佳方案——不开车
    Mar. 25

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